Episode 08 - Building Identity for Better Relationships with Amber Jones
Oct 23, 2023
Discover the transformative power of building identity for better relationships in this episode featuring Adult Chair® Coach, Amber Jones. Join us as Amber shares her personal journey of love and loss, and how she found her true identity after divorce and doing her own personal work.
Through the lessons she learned from her first marriage, she’s been able to help others navigate similar terrains specifically focusing on building up yourself before and after a relationship.
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Amber emphasizes the critical importance of engaging in identity work before entering a relationship. Many individuals, she notes, find themselves in relationships without a clear understanding of who they are, which can lead to conflicts and a loss of self. By asking questions like
Who am I?
What do I want?
What brings me joy?
What nourishes my soul?
individuals can establish a stronger sense of self and avoid becoming overly enmeshed in the relationship dynamic.
Drawing from her own experiences, Amber uses the analogy of building blocks to assist clients in exploring different facets of themselves. By recognizing and accepting various traits, preferences, and values, individuals can begin to construct a more comprehensive self-image, understanding that it's acceptable to have conflicting facets at times.
Furthermore, she highlights the importance of embracing the complexity within one's identity. She shares how she successfully integrated diverse elements of her own identity, such as being biracial and navigating diverse cultural backgrounds, into a cohesive whole through self-reflection and acceptance.
In addition to identity work, Amber discusses the use of guided meditations as a potent tool to help individuals quiet their minds, connect with their emotions, and process grief following a breakup. She stresses the importance of grounding oneself in reality and confronting post-breakup emotions before moving forward.
Embracing complexity and making room for all aspects of oneself is crucial for personal growth and self-acceptance. Through Amber's guidance, individuals can embark on a journey of self-discovery, embracing all parts of themselves to create a complete and authentic self.
Join us on this journey of self-discovery and healing as we delve into the importance of building identity for better relationships.
In this episode, we discuss:
[00:01:16] Love and relationships journey.
[00:04:49] Conscious uncoupling.
[00:09:35] Navigating complex family dynamics.
[00:13:01] Processing emotions after a breakup.
[00:19:31] Navigating feelings of inadequacy.
[00:21:51] Identity work.
[00:25:41] Identity work and building blocks.
[00:30:25] Embracing conflicting parts of self.
[00:32:44] Embracing complexity in architectural diversity.
[00:37:45] Navigating personal identity and growth.
Quotes:
"I would have never thought after a breakup I should go meditate." - LaShonda Walker
"What am I calling in? How am I showing up for myself? What is my identity? How am I presenting? And what is that calling in?" - Amber Jones
"The idea of giving the person a block and having them write down something about themselves to rebuild who they are, that's powerful." - LaShonda Walker
"I could be one person and that I am allowed to be complex. I think as women, we need to acknowledge and allow space for ourselves to be complex." - Amber Jones
"It is okay to be complex. You don't have to deny one part of yourself in order to accommodate this part because we're complex people." - Amber Jones
"Amber has helped me with my identity and being comfortable with navigating multiple parts and pieces of me and that I didn't have to put one aspect of me on the shelf in order to be okay in another aspect." - LaShonda Walker
"Discovering your authentic self is a process, but just stay curious and we'll work through it together." - LaShonda Walker
Guest Information: